From the category archives:

My Nutty Husband

The fart that shook the earth

by Heather Kephart October 16, 2009 Humor
Zombies as portrayed in the movie Night of the...

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Every morning my husband Dennis emerges from the bathroom at 5:30 am and blasts me with a shock of light.
I roll over and take my Levothyroid (I do this as soon as humanly possible since I am then required to wait for an hour before having food and *gasp* coffee) and then, as [...]

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A whale of a greeting

by Heather Kephart October 13, 2009 My Nutty Husband
whale_drawing

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Does Motherhood Make Us Bossy?

by Heather Kephart October 12, 2009 Domestic Goddessing
heatherkate

I’ve never been bossy.
I can distinctly remember several times when, as a girl, my Mom took one playmate or another aside and lectured her about bossing me around. Nobody’s Mom ever took me aside and gave me the bossy girl lecture. In retrospect my Mom has mentioned quite a few times that she wishes she’d [...]

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Good Morning,Toilet!

by Heather Kephart September 22, 2009 Family

My husband Dennis left me a sweet note this morning on his way to work.

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens, sunshine and flowers and toilets and mittens, these are a few of my favorite things!
Gratuitous shots of Joe and Lily:

The other night at bedtime, like most kids, Joe wanted me to read him a [...]

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Car Tripping

by Heather Kephart September 2, 2009 Family

My family and I boarded the Quest last week and set sail for Placerville, CA. We stopped often to look and touch and taste, but what amused me the most were my husband Dennis’ quips as he navigated back down the 101 towards the barren, scorpion-ridden kiln of a desert we call home.
Dennis pontificated about [...]

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What was that song called?

by Heather Kephart August 17, 2009 Family
Bedside

Joe’s been acting up around dinner time lately. He flat out refuses to dine with us and bounces around the kitchen asking for food items he knows he won’t be getting. “Blueberry lollipop” is his new mantra. Do blueberry lollipops even exist?
Tonight one thing led to another and Joe found himself in a two minute [...]

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Nuts and a Diet Coke

by Heather Kephart August 17, 2009 Family
Diet Coke and Mentos geyser.

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Saturday, from the master bathroom…
Dennis: It’s like I opened the door and stuck my head inside your butt!
Me:
Dennis: Shouldn’t it be gone by now? I’ve been waiting to come in here.
Me: I’m sure it wasn’t as bad as…
Dennis: Baby. No, it was worse. Stink molecules are still in my nose.
*************************
Holding up remnants [...]

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Trouble With Bug Tape

by Heather Kephart June 20, 2009 Family

My husband looked me square in the eye last night and said, “I’ve got a Dennisism to share with you”. As you can imagine, I was both excited and a little fearful. Here is my account of his recollection:
[At work the exterminator puts in bug plates on the floor]…So one of those bug plates that [...]

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It’s no Wolf Cat

by Heather Kephart June 5, 2009 My Nutty Husband

…but I think it has a certain charm. Go, Dennis!

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Would you rather be brave or smart?

by Heather Kephart May 17, 2009 Family

The other day I took one of those silly Facebook quizzes, “Where would the Sorting Hat place you?“, and ended up in Gryffindor.
For those not familiar with the Harry Potter book and movie phenomenon, or who need a little brushing up like myself, here’s more information about the four houses of Hogwarts, taken from the [...]

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